Photography and My Phoenix Rising

Mythical Phoenix Rising

 It is now the seventh  and last week of the photograpghy course I am taking. The time went quickly and I learned much. I am sad that it is ending as it was a time of renewed exploration for me , which I hope is only the entry to a long creative odyssey. I have learned new things and also remember old concepts that I was introduced to many years ago. Mostly, it has felt like getting reaquainted with an old cherished friend, someone or something that I have woefully neglected these many years. There initially was a flood of new technological concepts, but once the flurry and glamour of  the new  modern techniques settled down, I was back in my own element of renewed artistry, vision and mostly the treasured gift of "seeing".I do not really know why I have neglected this passion sitting , waiting inside of me for so long.Photograghy has always been on my mind, it always is part of how I see the world, yet I have not picked up my camera as a natural companion for so so long.
  I believe that much of my refound exhuberance is due to my own ongoing developmental process, rejuvenation, perhaps even resurrection. I think unknowingly, I have slept through many years of my life, not that my life is uninteresting or without meaning. But, the part of life having to do with pursuing a passion,doing things the way I want to do them rather than just doing them because they are the right things to do with one's  life, is emerging with greater confidence of late.As I look back on the many"things" , I have done in my life, it seems I have spent much time on the "dutiful track," not that is not a worthwhile way to live a life.I do not think that it was much of a priority as I grew up to give freedom of exploration of myself or a curiousity by those who raised me to get to know the  me emerging inside. As I work with many families and their children, I observe the common trap of parents "creating children in their own image", not giving  much attention to the person the child inherently is and thus fostering their growth based on the child's unique talents and passions.I, as many of us on this planet, race along on the"dutiful,their expectations track",never really living our lives.When we come across those who"dare to be different",those that choose a path that is uniquely theirs, those who unabashedly pursue their passions, we are frightened, perhaps jealous of their courage, to live their life as awake and vibrant.
   So this photography class has shaken my world some. It has kindled my memory of the many passions I have let lay dormant in the service of duty and service. I remember vividly, my first slr film camera and more importantly the me curious about all of life. I remember the me who walked and walked in another country
stopping to talk to people on the sreets.I remember the wondrous stories of their lives, how their bodily gestures, facial expression spoke more than any words.  I remember my reverance at taking in the beauty of the human face.I remember the sometimes coy request to take their picture and somehow top off, seal the moment as treasured. I have long longed to return to something of those days. I have long longed to allow me to know me better. I have longed to develop such courage as  to live life with greater meaning,passion and eros.,allowing myself the gifts I find in "seeing" and sharing that passion .....